Let me state right off the bat here that I am well aware that this video is almost 34 minutes long, which seems like an oppressively long time for a YouTube video. And yet somehow, that 34 minutes manages to fly right by because of how goddamn engrossing it is. (Although you still might want to skip around a bit.)
Former world beard champion Davin Cara (who filmed himself performing a similar ritual three years ago) says early on in the video that he knew he was different from the other kids, when — at a pool party following his eighth grade graduation at just 14 years old — his fellow students noticed the impressive amount of hair he already had growing on his back.
Cara says he’s only shaved his chest and back one other time in his life, all the way back in high school, but is finally doing it again thanks to a “physique competition” he’s taking part in. It’s three minutes into the video before the big reveal when he finally takes his shirt off, and when he does, Cara reveals a thick, lush coat of body hair that looks like a dang football jersey.
And even then, it’s not until 13 minutes in before he gets on with the task at hand. “Are we saving it? Locks of love?” he asks his adoring wife, who — by the way — is a saint for filming the whole time.
Finally, nearly 20 minutes later, the moment of truth:
We have no idea what the upkeep for Cara’s new style is going to be, because his competition is still a ways off, and this was just a preliminary shaving to be able to monitor his progress. One thing’s for sure, though: this guy’s gonna be one hell of an itchy mofo.