A Man Lost His Penis To A Hyena Because A Witch Doctor Said That's How He'd Get Rich

Senior Pop Culture Editor
03.31.14 9 Comments

Please do not listen to witch doctors. They are bad news. Think Satan, if Satan had gypsy blood. They’ll tell you how to get rich, but it will involve feeding your manhood to a wild hyena. Not only will you still be poor, but you won’t be able to have a kid who might become rich and you can leech off him until your dying days.

Take, for instance, the story of Chamangeni Zulu.

The money crazed man aged between 20 and 24, who was admitted to Ward B at Chipata General Hospital, said he lost his body parts in his quest to become rich.

Mr. Zulu narrated from his hospital bed yesterday that he was told to sacrifice parts of his body in order to become rich. “I came from Malawi and when I arrived in Chipata I met some business persons who told me that the best way to become rich was to sacrifice parts of my body. On 24th March, 2014 around 04:00 hours, I went to a bush where I was instructed to be naked and a hyena came to me and started eating my toes and eventually my manhood was eaten.” (Via)

The money quote: “Yes, it is true that he lost his manhood and three toes after being bitten by a hyena, but his condition is stable.” If only Zulu had earned any money.

Via Times of Zambia

Around The Web

UPROXX Twitter