The Utah Jazz Are All A Bunch Of Caffeine Fiends Now Thanks To Boris Diaw

10.21.16 1 month ago

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Utah is a state, thanks to Mormonism, that frowns upon hot drinks. Ignoring the aspects of a religion that has rules about drink temperature, you would think this is the last place in the world a coffee connoisseur would thrive.

Boris Diaw, who was traded by the San Antonio Spurs to the Jazz this offseason, not only loves his coffee but has already founded a club that allows for him and his teammates to drink and discuss the caffeinated beverage. It’s possible Utah has the fewest coffeeshops per capita in the United States, according to a Wall Street Journal story, but that hasn’t prevented Diaw from starting a coffee clique.

But the Jazz’s growing coffee group already includes several players, coaches and executives who sip espresso before practices and home games and visit hip coffeeshops on the road.

The person most responsible for their awakening is Diaw, who brews espresso for the Jazz, because he believes drinking coffee is a team-building exercise. The other reason Diaw stops by his local coffeeshop at least once a day is that he is simply obsessed. He has an espresso machine at home. He has one in Utah’s practice facility. He’s already working on a third for the Jazz’s arena. He also has informed opinions about Nespresso pods. And he keeps a mental list of the best coffeeshops in NBA cities based on their walking distance from the team hotel.

I don’t know how to feel about this. I enjoy coffee. Not to this extent, but I drink it. But would I want to deal with someone like Diaw that apparently is addicted to what is essentially a drug and is trying to push it on people he just met a couple months ago? I bet he talks about incessantly on the plane. “Can’t wait to land and get some coffee.” Yeah, Boris, we all know.

Wait, could Diaw be Twitter’s @coffee_dad? Somehow, Diaw does not follow @coffee_dad, so can someone please inform him about this? I’d love to see Diaw and @coffee_dad become best friends.

(Wall Street Journal)

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