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BASEBALL BILLIONAIRE: NOT BARRY BONDS

By 03.12.07

Matt White is a journeyman minor league pitcher who's trying to break in with the Dodgers this season. He also has the best chance to become the first billionaire baseball player.

White, who has appeared in seven big league games in nine professional seasons, paid $50,000 three years ago to buy 50 acres of land from an elderly aunt who needed the money to pay for a nursing home. While clearing out a couple acres to build a home, he discovered stone ledges in the ground, prompting him to have the property surveyed. A geologist estimated there were 24 million tons of the stone on his land. The stone is being sold for upward of $100 per ton, meaning there's well over $2 billion worth of material used for sidewalks, patios and the like.

Riiiiiight, he found the rock "after" he bought it from his feeble old aunt. As a "favor to her." Because she "needed the money." Whatever happened, he definitely did NOT screw over his poverty-stricken, dying aunt to become the country's next shale baron.

Of course, due to overhead costs like mining and transportation, White may have to settle for selling the land for only a couple hundred million dollars. Tough break. Meanwhile his aunt has bedsores and needs her bedpan changed. But screw her, she's old and smells funny.


TOPICS#MLB

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