BRETT MYERS CALLS REPORTER 'RETARDED'
"Punchline Posterchild..."

NEW LAME SPORT: CELL PHONE HURLING

By 08.26.07

The mighty Finns now dominate the 2 most prestigious sports in the world: ski-jumping and cell phone hurling:

Finnish domination in the distance event continued when Tommi Huotari took gold with a throw of 89.62 meters (294 feet), a few short of the world record.  "I have never thrown a phone before but have been participating in potato-throwing … surprisingly, a potato flies further," said the 38-year-old engineer.

Wow, that's unusual.  Most competitors begin with cell phones, and then move on to potatoes.  Also, I advise everybody in Finland to avoid anything this man has engineered.  

[A] teenaged circus performer won the freestyle gold medal at the world championships on Saturday. Taco Cohen of the Netherlands, who was celebrating his 19th birthday, used acrobatics and juggling in his performance which was judged on aesthetics and artistic impression. He told Reuters his performance reflected his training in a youth circus. "Juggling I have done for many years with balls. (But) these are irregular shapes and weights, it is difficult."

A Dutch circus juggler named Taco?  Sounds like he'll be juggling his balls for many years to come. -KD


TAGSCELLULAR PHONESFOOD NAMESMISCELLANY

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