The Whatever Kennel Club Dog Show isn't a sport. Not remotely. Women lounging around in bathing suits is more of a sport than dog breeding. But on a shitty day when it's raining and slushy and there are steroid affidavits and Congressional panels going on, it's kinda nice to say, Awwwww wook at da widdo puppy! All hail Uno, best in show:
The judge could hear Uno, the 15-inch beagle, baying as he gave his once-over to the standard poodle. And when he completed his observations, he needed four minutes before he pointed to the winner: Uno, the beagle, or Ch. K-Run’s Park Me In First, who will turn 3 in May…
“He’s the most perfect beagle I’ve ever seen,” Jones said at a news conference, where Uno hopped on the judge’s legs trying to get at his water.
So let's just go ahead and get the Best in Show quotes out of the way, hmmm? I'm gonna go with, "I went to one of those obedience places once… it was all going well until they spilled hot candle wax on my private parts."