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What's On Tonight: This Man

Bored? Cyber-Shock Philadelphia Hooligan Fans!

By / 07.12.10

From the brilliant minds at TAUNTR comes this very entertaining way to spend half an hour of your life as you run around as a Philadelphia security guard armed with a taser attempting to quell unruly fans bent on proving that they have the civil disobedience ability of the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man or a bitchy sorceress with an unshakeable yeast infection.

Though I hate to see the reputation of the Philadelphia dragged through the mud yet again, we might actually deserve some public mocking this time. The recent rash of unfortunate fan douchebaggery has been an absolute embarrassment for a city that’s already known for having some of the worst people on earth (somewhat rightfully so). Though the ‘booing of Santa Claus’ tale is overblown and stupid (you can read the real story here), these new incidents are absolutely atrocious. Puking on kids? Toddlers with beers? COME ON! As a resident of the city of Philadelphia I say if you want to do something stupid at least make it cool, like running onto the field dressed up as a giant baby attempting to suck Prince Fielder’s teets, or something with a flare gun again. Everybody loves flare guns. Anyway, go try the game. Pretend you’re tasing the high school upperclassmen who made you take out his trash then put a candy apple in your hair as your reward. I sure did. *Quietly weeps*

Too old for computer gaming you say? WELL TOO BAD! This is a challenge from the editors of With Leather to beat my high score of not being able to get out of the second round because I don’t condone the tasing of small children drinking beers. It might hurt their brains and I don’t want to spill their beverages. Oh, who am I kidding, I’m totally fine with tasing small children, I just don’t have the technical ability to beat the level. The future is hard.

H/T City Paper


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