Chuck Norris + World of Warcraft = Old Meme
Thundercats, Hoooooooooooly Crap This Is Cool

Remember Power Balance Bracelets? They’re Back, In Lawsuit Form

By / 11.21.11

Hey there, With Leather reader, were you one of the lucky, forthright individuals who thought a hologram-embedded band could be scientifically proven to enhance balance, flexibility and strength because Shaq and Drew Brees and some tennis players said so? Did your brain trick you into thinking someone would sell super-human strength for only $29.99? Do you play those Nigel West Dickens missions in Red Dead Redemption and think, “hey, this guy’s onto something”? Then you’ll love this quote from TMZ, which you probably already read:

Power Balance — the company that allegedly duped athletes into believing its bracelets could provide super-human strength — is about to take a $57 million dollar hit in a lawsuit filed by people who called BS on the product … TMZ has learned.

Now, sources with direct knowledge of the situation tell TMZ … the company has reached a settlement worth $57.4 million, intended to compensate all those who were misled into buying the product.

And it gets worse for PB — we’re told the company will be declaring bankruptcy and plans to fold up shop altogether.

You can order a Power Balance Bracelet today via Amazon for $2.60, a 91% discount. And hey, just because there’s no scientific evidence to back it up and the phrase “holograms which are embedded with frequencies” is meaningless doesn’t mean those 33 five-star reviews are invalid. Right? Uh, right? Sh*t, now what am I gonna tell my friend at the mall kiosk?

Everything’s a placebo, though, isn’t it? Eventually we’re going to find out we don’t even need food, we’ve just convinced ourselves that we’ll starve to death if we don’t have it. If I can’t trust a Shaq-endorsed mega bracelet, what can I trust?


TOPICS#NBA#NFL
TAGSDREW BREESLAWSUITSShaqShaquille O'NealSTUPID PEOPLE DOING STUPID THINGSTMZTOO MANY SIMPSONS REFERENCES

Join The Discussion


[avatar]

Join the discussion. or Register





Powered by WordPress.com VIP