Worst: The Day The Porno Sax Died
This old heart can only take so much.
Poor Aksana. She never really became good, but she worked her Lithuanian butt off and elevated her badness until she achieved a sort of transcendent awfulness. Or maybe she is actually good — I mean, I’m pretty sure she’s not, but I dunno. I know I can’t tear my eyes away during her matches. Of course that’s largely because she’s usually legit beating the f-ck out of whatever poor girl is in there with her, so maybe it’s best she’s gone, but still…[sounds the 21 porno sax salute].
Best: Wyatt vs. Ambrose
This match was really damn good — probably Bray’s best since his battle with Daniel Bryan at Royal Rumble. This is one of those matches where you kind of wish the guys were main eventers, because if these two were really allowed to cut loose, this would have been a classic. Hopefully in a year or two when both guys are former champs, this match will be looked back upon as an early, forgotten Bray/Ambrose classic.
Dean Ambrose is the perfect opponent for Bray. As I’ve mentioned in the past, Bray is big, but not that big and he works best against smaller guys who can pinball off him and make his monster offense look legit. Ambrose definitely fits that bill, and he can answer every weird tick and crazy face from Bray with a weird tick and crazy face of his own. Both guys beat the tar out of each other, and Ambrose had some wonderfully idiosyncratic moments while selling, like the bit where he just started flopping face-and-shoulder first into the mat multiple times to get feeling back in the shoulder after Bray slammed it into the apron. I mean, I think that’s what he was doing. Regardless, it was amusing stuff.
Even the distraction finish was better than usual. When Rollins popped up on the announce table Ambrose didn’t just point and shout and await his roll-up, he went after the f-cker. If you really hate somebody so much that the mere sight of them makes you lose all concentration and composure, you don’t just stand there bugging your eyes out, you go introduce that jerk to your fist. The finish of this match felt like a real moment as opposed to an overused WWE trope.
So yeah, awesome match that you should totally go out of your way to see. Or, you know, enjoy it when they do it again on Raw.