For The Creepiest Sports Fan You Know, Here's Mickey Mantle's Deathbed Speech, Now Available At Auction

03.03.14 3 years ago

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Do you love the New York Yankees? Are you super f*cking morbid? HERE’S THE PERFECT GIFT.

Grey Flannel Auctions is set to auction off a deathbed speech — you read that right, a deathbed speech — written and delivered by Yankees legend Mickey Mantle four weeks before his death in 1995. If that’s not creepy enough for you, it’s written on the back of a PGA tour score card, because I guess when a guy’s dying in the hospital and uses his final breaths to tell you how much he loves God and America he doesn’t have time to find a piece of paper.

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“I didn’t know how Lou Gehrig could here at home plate knowing he was going to die and say he was the luckiest man on the face of Earth. Now I think I know.”

“Please don’t do drugs and alcohol. God only gave us one body. Take care of it.”

PUT IT ON YOUR COFFEE TABLE, SHOW IT TO YOUR KIDS.

I think I speak for everyone when I say “a man’s terrified final thoughts and regrets are a cool thing to hang up next to your autographed Steve Sax jersey and that cool Phillie Phanatic bobblehead, you should totally buy it.” And by everyone I mean nobody ever.

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