Dear Lord, Let’s Watch The Memphis Grizzlies Miss 7 Lay-Ups In A Row

I am a basketball expert. Because of this, I can say with confidence that missing seven consecutive lay-ups is not a good way to win the Western Conference finals.

The announcers play it off as a spectacular defensive span by the Spurs, but it reminded me the world of those times when I’d have to do lay-ups in gym class, and I was just a little fat white kid with negative-a-hundred basketball experience and the coordination of a pug. Just desperate hopping and extended arms and basketballs hitting the bottom of the rim. The Spurs probably could’ve walked backwards with their hands in the air and played the same defense.

Lionel Hollins, if you’re reading this, check your e-mail. I sent you something. The subject is MEMPHIS GRIZZLIES SHOULD TRY HARD TO NOT BE THIS BAD AT BASKETBALL RIGHT NOW. Lots of good information inside.