Fast-forward to 4:55 for the beat-down
Saturday night’s EliteXC card wasn’t particularly awful to watch, but it was disastrous for CBS. Kimbo Slice, the brawling man-beast who was supposed to rise to dominance in MMA, was exposed in the worst way possible: after aging tomato can Ken Shamrock was a late scratch, EliteXC tossed in much younger tomato can Seth Petruzelli, a third-rate karate specialist who couldn’t hack it on “The Ultimate Fighter.” Fourteen seconds into the match, whatever thread of credibility EliteXC had was gone forever.
To make things more fun, Deadspin picked up some super-gay photos of Petruzelli over the weekend, but it’s more goofball-playing-around-gay, not homosexual-gay, as he’s actually married. Yes, to a woman.
In other EliteXC news, former UFC heavyweight champ Andrei Arlovski beat a really fat guy, Jake Shields retained his welterweight belt, and Gina Carano is really, really pretty. I know she wants to be taken seriously as a fighter (she won, by the way), but she’s just so damn good-looking. She won a unanimous decision after three rounds, and she looked ready to go to brunch. It’s startling, really. Women that muscular are usually only attractive to Alex Rodriguez.