01.12.09 9 years ago 20 Comments

With Gators QB Tim Tebow announcing his return to Florida for his senior year, there has been much celebration in Gainesville, where

Elsewhere, among us cynical types who occasionally criticize the media, there’s bona fide hand-wringing about the fawning media attention Tebow gets.  Check out this little journo-porn (religiolism?) from the Palm Beach Post:

The only player left in Florida’s dressing room after the game, he sat quietly at his locker in nothing more than gray boxer briefs with his hands folded, hunched over like someone trying desperately to catch his breath. Or settle his mind. Or both. Team attendants cleaning up dared only whisper in the silence out of respect or compassion.

Those muscles listed in press guides, all 240 pounds of them, they can, in fact, hang heavily on a man. He seemed almost weighed down by the bulk of his physique. The toll his perfectly tuned body had taken in 3 1/2 hours against Oklahoma was clear from the red burns on the right shoulder where he wore an ice pack for almost an hour.

The crystal blue eyes that usually light up his square but softly freckled face seemed washed of color, his eyelids heavy, half-closing. If ever a man has looked exhausted, defined precisely as depleted or completely used up of his natural riches, Tebow was that man.

Ya know, maybe he wouldn’t be so depleted of his natural riches if people stopped sucking him off all the time.  Just sayin’.

(image from Nicholas Carson via Cajun Boy – click to enlarge)

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