What Is Skynet? Sorry, We Were Looking For ‘What Is Weekend Picks’

Every Friday we pick the winners to the most apocalyptic matchups. We call it “Weekend Picks.” Home teams are in ALL CAPS.

Yesterday: Machine over MAN. “Jeopardy!” wunderkind Ken Jennings was bested (along with fellow champ Brad Rutter) in a test game by Watson, IBM’s supercomputer successor to chess machine Deep Blue. You can write your own uncreative Armageddon joke, but it won’t do anything to assuage Alex Trebek, who looks genuinely terrified.

Tonight: SPURS -10 over Mavericks. Dirk Nowitzki is still out with a sprained right knee, and Dallas has been horrible without him. They’re six games behind San Antonio, who have only lost six games all year.

Saturday: Ravens +3 over STEELERS. If an NFL game could ever end 1-0, this would be that game. I’m expecting one TD each and a safety making the difference. And about 20 concussions and half a million dollars in fines.

FALCONS -3 over Packers. Atlanta cakewalked to a first-round bye with a relatively weak schedule (they played Carolina twice and the entire NFC West). But they went 7-1 at home; pair that with Green Bay’s 3-5 record on the road. Not only will the Packers get beat up, but expect Packer fans to be assaulted when cheering for fullback John Kuhn among the Atlanta faithful.

Sunday: Seahawks +10 over BEARS. Surprised? Did you really think I was taking Jay Cutler?

Jets +9 over PATRIOTS. No way that the Jets get blown out again at Foxboro…right?

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