Endings years of speculation, Jesse and the Rippers, whose 1992 smash-hit “Forever” catapulted Fat Fish Records to the multi-platinum success story it is today, will reunite on this Friday’s episode of Late Night with Jimmy Fallon. The members of the revered rock band hadn’t spoken to each other in over a decade, since their lead singer and lyricist, heartthrob Jesse Katsopolis, left the group to form Hot Daddy and the Monkey Puppets, but according to drummer Guy In Flannel Shirt, “I decided to pick up the phone, and let the hatred slide off of me…forever.”
Times have been particularly hard for Random Black Dude, who played the bongos for the Rippers for some reason. He received nationwide attention when he walked into the Smash Club, a San Fransisco venue founded by Katsopolis, with a cardboard cutout of Elvis and yelled, “THE KING IS DEAD.” He apologized for his misdeeds on Behind the Music: I Got Ripped, but the damage was already done, or so we all thought.
When reached for comment, Katsopolis, who is now better known as the spokesperson for Lane Bryant’s plus-sized women’s collection (“Have curvy”), wouldn’t answer why he decided to get the band back together, or discuss the rumors that he and Joey Gladstone were preparing for their now-legal sunny California wedding. But he did say, “Remember when I was Vulture? The f*ck was that?” before adding, “Now cut. it. out. with these questions.”
There remains no word on whether the Exits will join Jesse and the Rippers on tour, with Shawn Hunter’s third cousin, Steve, on vocals, after the horrific grease fire that left Shawn without the ability to love. And breathe.