There have been quite a few moments during this season of True Blood – the sixth overall and certainly not the show’s final – that I’ve found myself wondering, “What the heck is going on here?” Among them, the entire Alcide/Sam/Emma/Nicole subplot, the quick lives of three of Andy Bellefleur’s four daughters and the depressing downward spiral of Terry Bellefleur. Strangely, as each of those (and others) played out, not a single one has left me as befuddled as one character’s storyline, as I expected him to be a major player from beginning to end.
But before we get to that, I thought that “Dead Meat,” the eighth episode of this shortened season – thanks a lot for getting pregnant, Anna Paquin – was relatively boring until the final minutes set us up for what I’m hoping and expecting to be two seriously crazy final episodes. In fact, I really want to just speculate on the preview for next week’s episode, “Life Matters,” but I’ll fight the urge. This time.
True or False: Hey, someone finally remembered that Niall hasn’t been seen in like four episodes.
Yeah, so about that whole befuddlement. Before “Dead Meat” began, I actually asked myself, “Hey, why hasn’t Sookie wondered where her grandfather went?” Because, you know, he was kind of instrumental in setting her up to take on Warlow, but then he’s locked away in another dimension and Sookie doesn’t even blink. Instead, she’s just like, “Hey, I’m gonna tie Warlow up and have sex with him now, because I’m Sookie and that’s what I do.”
Anyway, I expect Niall to make a comeback in one of these last two episodes. Or at least show us where the hell Warlow sent him to. You can’t just forget Rutger Hauer like that.
True or False: Steve Newlin is still the absolute worst character in the history of shows about vampires.
Okay, back to the camp, where the tainted Tru Blood has quickly become the worst kept secret. Not only is it Steve Newlin’s fault that our favorite vampires have been locked up in the vamp camp, but now he’s selling them out to Sarah Newlin, because he’s too tired to run in the hamster wheel. I’d say that I want someone to rip his spine out, but he clearly doesn’t have one. I’m hoping that he doesn’t die by meeting the sun and is instead kept around for something truly gruesome. He really deserves it.
True or False: You just don’t pick a fight with Alcide, ladies.
On one hand, it’s nice to see Alcide kicking some ass again after spending the entire season walking around all pissed off, trying to find Sam and Emma, only to let them go. On the other hand, it’s not really fun to watch him beat the crap out of Rikki and the other women of the pack. I still have no clue what is being set up for Alcide, but I hope it’s something pretty entertaining to make up for everything else this season.
True or False: There’s no reason to go after Terry’s murderer.
I get that Arlene is really upset that Terry was killed, but there’s no point to go after the guy who killed him. He hired Justin to shoot him because he didn’t want to be miserable anymore, so Arlene should just take the $2 million and have a nice funeral, and then maybe go on a little vacation for the final two episodes.