Today Is Brought To You By Idris Elba’s Enormous Penis

These paparazzi photos of Idris Elba hit the internet today, and WHAT THE F*CK, IDRIS ELBA? Is that seriously what Idris Elba’s penis looks like? Do penises even come that big? A Google search for “biggest penis ever” was frustratingly unhelpful on this subject. If that thing is for real, and I have no idea what else it could possibly be, then he makes Jon Hamm look like Wee Man (whose penis I have actually recently seen, thanks to Vince at Filmdrunk).

I mean, can a vagina even accommodate something that big? How would he have sex with a normal woman? And what kind of underpants does he buy? Does he even wear underpants? Clearly he’s not wearing any here. Do you think dogs can sense it when they’re around him??

There are so many questions and not enough hours in the day. I’m just starting season two of The Wire and I can tell you I’m not going to be watching 100% for the plot from now on, for damn sure.

Behold, Idris Elba’s huge schlong:

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