So, here’s the thing…
As you may have noticed, the title of our Happy Endings recap has changed from “Let’s Talk About Last Night’s Episode Of Happy Endings” to “Let’s Talk About This Week’s Episodes Of Happy Endings. ABC’s decision to haphazardly toss an extra episode of the show into their schedule at 10 p.m. on Sundays left us in a bit of a bind (and them, too, given the lackluster results). Rather than do two recaps per week of a show that appears to be in trouble, what we’re going to do is one, jam-packed, double-dip recap and discussion on Wednesday afternoons, until both episodes get bumped once Dancing With the Stars comes back. I’m not particularly happy about any of these developments — hence my choice of banner image for this post — but it was either this or go home, hard boil an egg, and eat it on the toilet. I think this is by far the better alternative.
The highlights are on the following pages, separated by episode. Get it together or I will slap you in the face.
“Fowl Play Date”
- The opening sequence of Sunday’s episode, with everyone building on the Rom-Com-Con joke, was a perfect example of why I like this show. I had started to roll my eyes at how corny the whole thing was, but then they guy at the next table did his version, which was to tell them to “shut the f-ck up.” They took a bad joke too far, but only as a way to point out how bad it was. I respect that.
- Unfortunately, Alex and Brad’s trip to Rom-Com-Con gets canceled when Penny and Brad accidentally kill her racist parrot, Tyler, while they are using industrial strength airplane glue to fix a broken mold of her giant 5-year-old hand. That was a fun sentence to type.
- Also, R.I.P. Tyler, I guess.
- Dave’s song about making Alex “come … home to me” … I believe the legendary and timeless rock ‘n rollsters Lit already made this joke, yes? I hope this wasn’t a trap by the Happy Endings writers to sniff out people who once bought a Lit CD. Because, uh, busted.
- I want to read Max’s screenplay for Heat II: It’s Getting Hot Up In Herre more than you can possibly imagine.
- Here are some things we learned about Alex in this episode, in addition to the giant-hands-as-a-kid thing: She eats birthday cake every night, she drinks margaritas with her pets on Taco Tuesday, and, most importantly, Her Eating Ribs > Penny Eating Wings. All day.
- Max’s ideal date involves wining, dining, and 79ing, because that is 10 better. Can’t argue with his logic.
- “How do you destroy a PDF? It’s in the clouds. I can’t control the clouds! I’m not Thor!”
- Dave and Jane try to set Max up with the gay versions of themselves, ruining his date with a guy who was into his story about a sex dream involving the Van Gundys (Jeff coaching defense, Stan coaching offense). This is terrible because (a) they seemed to be hitting it off, and (b) I really wanted to hear the end of that story. This show’s NBA humor is always laser-sharp.
- Alex gets a bird autopsy on Tyler (“a huge racist and an even hugerer friend”) because she suspected foul play. If she needs an expert in bird law, I know just the guy.
“Ordinary Extraordinary Love”
- Dave asks Jane to “surprise him” with a drink at the bar, then tries to guess what is by taste. Welp, that settles it. I hate Dave.
- The three big stories in this episode were Max’s search for a mate, Alex and Penny using a pop star for PR purposes, and Brad feeling emasculated by Jane’s new breadwinner status. The first two were much funnier, although the latter did lead to a mention of Brad’s “inverted wiener” and the Man-Am games, so it was still pretty decent all-around.
- Effective immediately I am starting all my conversations with friends with “Guys, SHUT UP. SHUT UP, guys,” and then demanding everyone focus on me.
- I’m starting to think I need a Derrick in my life. Just one. Definitely not more than that. But one would be nice. He was hilarious in this episode.
- Speaking of the gays, there were a lot of gay subculture names in this episode. We had twinks, ostriches, ginger snaps, bears, chameleons, lobsters, beers and bulls (in a strictly Orlando Magic bar), power seals, and, my favorite, the optimistic red velvet walruses, among others. That must have been a fun hour in the writers’ room.
- Alex hasn’t been too interested in music “since Smash Mouth left the game.” Between her taste in food and music she’s basically the female Guy Fieri, and that in no way affects the crush I have on her. I have much to ponder.
- “Greek yogurt is the closest shave you can get … from a yogurt.”
- “Did you power wash this place with farts?”
- Max called Jane both a “beautiful broomstick” and a “dumb lamppost.” It’s a miracle she didn’t kill him.
- Gay Yoda is a little redundant.
- It appears I focused mostly on Max’s storyline in my notes last night. This is probably because (a) it was great, and (b) Max is quickly becoming my favorite character, especially after these last two episodes. Either way, I’m sorry for skimping on the others. Please accept this as my apology.