Taco From ‘The League’ Is Using Kickstarter To Raise $500 Million So He Can Be ‘Super Rich’

Entertainment Features
05.29.13 11 Comments

Leave it to Jon Lajoie — who plays Taco on The League — to fully make a mockery of Zach Braff’s Kickstarter campaign to raise $2 million so he can make his movie. Lajoie’s goals are much loftier than Braff’s, however. While conceding that he is rich, Lajoie wants something more from Kickstarter. To be SUPER RICH. He wants Jay-Z money. “After I saw how ‘Veronica Mars’ and Zach Braff fans responded to their projects in a mind-blowing way,” Lajoie says. “I couldn’t help but think, what if instead of relying on traditional methods of wealth acquisition .. what if I turned to you, my fans, for the money? By you simply handing over your hard-earned money to me, I can become super rich without all the added pressure of actually doing something.”

Best Taco get-rich scheme ever. Here’s what he has planned for his Kickstarter rewards:

$20: “You will get nothing because $20 don’t mean sh*t to rich people like me.”

$50: “I will send you a photograph of me burning a $50 bill while riding a jet ski.”

$500: “I will personally plug your business in one of my videos.

$1,000: “I will send you a video of me looking at your Facebook profile and being disgusted by your pathetic life.”

$10,000: “I will let you tell your friends that you met me. (You won’t actually get to meet me.)”

The irony is, if this were an actual Kickstarter, he’d probably have $1 million by the end of the day (I’d send him a $50 just to see him burn it on his jet ski.)

(Source: Jon Lajoie)

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Dustin is a entertainment writer at Uproxx specializing in television theories, yarn walls, 'The Walking Dead,' 'Better Call Saul,' and box-office reporting. He is also the publisher of Pajiba, and firmly believes that Steven Avery did it.

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