Earlier this week, Tracy Morgan appeared at the re-launch party for New York Magazine’s Vulture blog (I guess my invite got lost in the email), and this is going to come as a shock to everyone, but he said some rambling and crazy things while speaking in stream-of-consciousness.
• “It’s dark in here, right? I feel like I got a tumor or something. They asked me to come up here and do some comedy. This is New York Magazine, right? You all computer geeks or something? I don’t know even how to use computers. [He addresses guest Maulik Pancholy, who plays Jack Donaghy’s assistant on 30 Rock.] Maulik, do I have a computer in my office? [Maulik shakes his head.] I don’t even have a computer. I don’t even how to turn them off. It start making noises, I just pull the plug out. Someone got on some good cologne back there. Someone has some good cologne on back there, too. It’s cheap, but it’s good.”
• “I just gotta be careful of gold diggers out there. That’s the thing, I got money now, so I got gold diggers comin’ out the woodwork. I went out to dinner with one last week. She ordered lobster and I was like, ‘You know that lobster tail is three fingers up the butthole, minimum?'”
• “Any gay guys in here? I’m friends with all kinds, I’m friends with all kinds. If you can take a dick, you can take a joke. I’m making fun of everybody. White people, black people, n*ggers, other n*ggers. I want everybody in here to say the word ‘n*gger’ out loud. It’s liberating. Y’all want to say it on three? One, two, three. [Silence.] You gotta free, come on! It’s 2011, goddammit.” [more quotes at Vulture]
Oh man. I guess it’s a good thing I wasn’t there. Because I definitely would have been the only person who said “n*gger” out loud. “What? Tracy Morgan told me to!”