Last Man Standing (ABC, Friday 8 p.m.) — I don’t really have any interest in this show, I just found out today that the Tim Allen sitcom is the third highest rated sitcom on ABC, and that Bill Cosby should model his comeback on Last Man Standing, and that thought depressed me.
Enlisted/Raising Hope (Fox, Friday 9 p.m.) — Enlisted switched time-slots with Raising Hope this week, but that shouldn’t affect you, because your DVR’ing them both, right?
Saturday Night Live (NBC, Saturday 11:30) — Jonah Hill hosts this weekend, and maybe he’ll work into a sketch the story about the time Joe Pesci put two in his stinker.
Lizzie Borden Took an Ax (Lifetime, Saturday 8 p.m.) — If you’re wondering what happened to Christina Ricci, here she is in a Lifetime movie (here’s the trailer). At least she’s still doing better than Thora Birch.
The 2014 NFL Pro Bowl (NBC, Sunday 7:30 p.m.) — If you’re wondering why NBC bothers airing the least interesting all-star game in sports, it’s because it still attracts over 12 million viewers, a number that I found astounding.
True Detective (HBO, Sunday 9 p.m.) — If you were concerned that the plot slowed to a simmer last week, the action picks up in Sunday night’s episode as Hart and Cohle catch a break in the case, although you’ll be seeing less of Alexandra Daddario. She’s still got plenty of screentime, it’s just there’s less of her in that screentime. Here’s a damn good promo for the episode.
The 56th Annual Grammy Awards (CBS, Sunday 8 p..) — Before you tune in to Sunday night’s telecast, check out the nominees and then gnash your teeth at the worst Grammy snubs of all time. Those are plain goddamn egregious. If you’re like me, and you don’t know much about contemporary music, fret not: Nine Inch Nails will close the show by playing with Queens of the Stone Age, Dave Grohl and Lindsey Buckingham. My face melted a little just typing that.
Sherlock (Sunday, PBS 9:58 p.m.) — Last week’s first episode back was absolutely brilliant, and anyone who says otherwise is trolling you.
