Saturday Night Live: Weekend Update Summer Edition (NBC, 9:00 p.m.) – NBC is trying to help us make sense of this batsh*t crazy summer by giving us more hot takes from its Weekend Update desk. The new and improved rundown will be 30 minutes long and hopefully include appearances by some fan favorite guests, as watching Michael Che and Colin Jost crack jokes for that long might get a tad irritating. But hey, at least they have a lot of material to work with.
Beat Shazam (Fox, 8:00 p.m.) – I’m now convinced. This is a cry for help. We hear you, Jamie.
Boy Band (ABC, 8:00 p.m.) – Tonight’s girl power episode has the contestants performing hit songs from female artists.
Project Runway (Lifetime, 8:00 p.m.) — Tim Gunn introduces Season 16’s sixteen new designers and gives us a behind-the-scenes look at their audition tapes.
Big Brother (CBS, 9:00 p.m.) – Another houseguest gets the boot. The remaining players compete for Head of Household. You know the drill.
First in Human (DSC, 9:00 p.m.) – In the premiere of this new docuseries, doctors attempt medical breakthroughs and test their treatments on gravely-ill patients.
Love Connection (Fox, 9:00 p.m.) – Andy Cohen is here to send two more singles on blind dates and then get them to trash-talk each other in front of a bunch of strangers.
The Story of Diana (ABC, 9:00 p.m.) – The two-part series concludes with a look at how Princess Diana remains relevant today.
Queen of the South (USA, 10:00 p.m.) — Epifanio plans to leave the cartel world for good just as soon as he hands a bit of justice to Cortez and Teresa competes with James for Camila’s trust, until new revelations force her to question everything.
The Mist (Spike, 10:00 p.m.) – Kevin makes a shocking discovery at Adrian’s home as Alex and Jay grow closer and Nathalie’s influence over the remaining church parishioners continues to grow.
The Night Shift (NBC, 10:00 p.m.) – Multiple injured veterans are brought to the E.R. which prompts flashbacks for Drew and problems for the rest of the staff including Paul and Shannon, who must improvise while tending to a former POW.
Zoo (CBS, 10:00 p.m.) – Mitch and Jamie go snake-hunting in California while the rest of the team try to rescue Abe and Daniela’s son.
The Guest Book (TBS, 10:30 p.m.) — Phyllis and her husband go on a weekend retreat with his boss and the boss’ much younger wife, which quickly proves becomes unbearable for Phyllis
LATE NIGHT GUESTS
Jimmy Kimmel Live!: John Lithgow, Jay Baruchel, Diana Krall
The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon: Anthony Anderson, Terry Gross, Kesha
The Late Show With Stephen Colbert: Millie Bobby Brown, Jim Jefferies, Zeshan B
Late Night With Seth Meyers: Howie Mandel, Sen. Tammy Duckworth, Aaron Schatz, Venzella Joy
The Late Late Show With James Corden: Aubrey Plaza, Jeremy Renner, Chris O’Dowd, Russ
The Daily Show With Trevor Noah: Trevor analyzes the state of news media
Conan: Bryan Cranston, Sebastian Maniscalco, Aimee Mann