Abraham Lincoln Versus History's Vampires: Morbius

Senior Contributor
06.19.12 9 Comments

Yesterday’s vote, Lincoln vs. Dracula, came out heavily in favor of Lincoln. Dracula had a wide variety of powers and abilities, but each of them had drawbacks, and his weaknesses meant the Impaler would likely wind up getting impaled.

Now for a vampire a little tougher and a lot more noble: Morbius, Marvel’s favorite bloodsucker.

Sure, they’re both heroes. But we all know heroes get in a fight the first time they meet: it’s what they do. So, before they realize they have a common enemy and team up to kill him, who’d nearly kill the other?

Remember, Lincoln is mortal. Skilled, well-armed, strong, and intelligent, but mortal.

Morbius, on the other hand, is actually a lot more durable and capable than yesterday’s fight, Dracula. He’s got none of the usual vampiric weaknesses; garlic is as delicious to him as it is to us, holy items give him no problems, he can take a shower like the rest of us, and even sunlight isn’t a problem for him. He’ll get a nasty burn and that’s about it: Abraham isn’t winning this fight by chucking Morbius through a window.

Just to rub it in, Morbius has a healing factor on top of everything else. He’s hardly Wolverine; he can’t regrow limbs. But he can recover from trauma in a few hours and, provided he’s willing to become a bloodthirsty mindless freak, even minutes.

On the other hand, Morbius can’t heal limbs or organs that get removed, and Abraham’s primary weapon is an axe. That in of itself loads the deck a bit in Abraham’s favor.

What do you think? Would Morbius win, or would Abraham have him at axepoint in no time?

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