So you know how earlier today you were concerned about those unpaid parking tickets and your winter heating bill? Yeah, well the good news is that you really don’t need to focus too much on that stuff right now, because OH MY GOD, WHAT THE F**K IS THAT?! Are you kidding me? I can barely handle small dogs let alone a grasshopper the size of a boxing glove. How the hell am I supposed to live my life normally after seeing something like this?
Well, step one is knowing that this photograph comes from Little Barrier Island in New Zealand, the only country known to carry these giant weta. Step two is to realize that this particular species is also endangered, so chances are slim you’re ever going to trip over one of these ladies. And the last step, part three, is understanding that this is the biggest giant weta they’ve ever recorded; so although they’re out there, most would never be this large. Thank God.
Via park ranger Mark Moffett:
“Three of us walked the trails of this small island for two nights scanning the vegetation for a giant weta. We spent many hours with no luck finding any at all, before we saw her up in a tree.”
“She enjoyed the carrot so much she seemed to ignore the fact she was resting on our hands and carried on munching away. She would have finished the carrot very quickly, but this is an extremely endangered species and we didn’t want to risk indigestion. After she had chewed a little I took this picture and we put her right back where we found her.” [DailyMail]
Wait, wait, wait -so what you’re telling me is that we let this thing go?! No one even attempted to kill it with fire?! Oh man, oh man, oh man, oh man…
*rips open medicine cabinet, feverishly searches for Xanax*
Additional (horrifying) image after the jump: