The Biggest Cliffhanger On ‘Game Of Thrones’ Involves Tyrion And A Brothel

Senior Pop Culture Editor


There are many questions left for David Benioff and D.B. Weiss to answer over the next two seasons of Game of Thrones, the final two seasons. When/if will the Wall fall? Is Daenerys going to rule the Seven Kingdoms? Where my boy Gendry at? And most importantly, when will Tyrion Lannister be able to finish his honeycomb joke? Back in season one’s “The Golden Crown,” while confessing his crimes to the Lady Regent of the Vale Lysa Arryn, Tyrion says:

“Where do I begin, my lords and ladies?

I am a vile man, I confess it. My crimes and sins are beyond counting. I have lied and cheated, gambled and whored. I’m not particularly good at violence, but I’m good at convincing others to do violence for me. You want specifics, I suppose. When I was seven, I saw a servant girl bathing in the river. I stole her robe and she was forced to return to the castle naked and in tears. I close my eyes, but I can still see her tits bouncing. When I was ten, I stuffed my uncle’s boots with goat shit. When confronted with my crime, I blamed a squire. Poor boy was flogged, and I escaped justice. When I was twelve I milked my eel into a pot of turtle stew. I flogged the one-eyed snake, I skinned my sausage. I made the bald man cry into the turtle stew, which I do believe my sister ate. At least I hope she did. I once brought a jackass and a honeycomb into a brothel…”

Tyrion unfortunately gets cut off by Lysa before he can finish his story. Well, the same thing happened five seasons later, in season six’s “No One,” under slightly different circumstances. It happens right after Missandei makes the worst joke Grey Worm’s ever heard, and right before the gang is rudely interrupted by the Masters start attacking Meereen. Here it is.

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