Just when you thought things couldn’t get any more surreal and dumb leading up to inauguration day, Dennis Hof, owner of the the Nevada’s Moonlite BunnyRanch and star of HBO’s Cathouse, is firing back at Vladimir Putin for some pretty lofty claims he made about Russian prostitutes. On Tuesday the Russian leader spoke out against President Obama for trying to undermine Donald Trump, while dismissing the recent salacious allegations against the president-elect. Although, he admitted, even if Trump hadn’t frolicked with his country’s women of the night, they are still undoubtedly “the best in the world.”
Ever the patriot, Hof thinks that American prostitutes are actually the best in the world, and he’s willing to put his money where his mouth is (ew) by offering Putin a “two-hour bondage cage session for some intense discipline” with his girls so they can prove how talented they are.
Furthermore, the BunnyRanch boss takes umbrage with Trump as he has not yet come forward to defend America’s great prostitutes… As if a president-elect has nothing better to do with his time. (LOL just kidding!)
“During the election, we had 300 ‘Hookers for Hillary‘ and 240 ‘Tramps for Trump,’” [Hof] explained. “He’s offended 540 girls and their customers who love them.”
According to [Hof], “Comparing our girls to Russian girls is ridiculous,” because unlike Russian prostitute who “have sex for money out of desperation,” American prostitutes take pride in their work. “They look at themselves as sexual nurses, healing men one penis at a time,” he said.
Heck, can we get one of them to be president? “Healing America One Penis At A Time” is an infinitely better campaign slogan than “Make America Great Again.”
(Via The Wrap)