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Do You Guys Wanna See A FRIGGIN’ NEWBORN BABY PENGUIN OR WHAT?

Look at that guy. LOOK AT THAT FRIGGIN’ GUY. Gettin’ little penguin neck rubs. Chillin’ at the Oregon Zoo, where he and two of his siblings were born just this month. Lookin’ all fuzzy wuzzy and sh*t. I bet his name is…

For now, keepers say, the recent arrivals are keeping cozy in their nest boxes, growing strong on a diet of regurgitated “fish smoothie” provided by their parents.

The young penguins’ genders won’t be known until their first full veterinary checkup takes place in about three months.

“The chicks look like velvety gray plush toys,” said curator Michael Illig, who oversees the zoo’s birds and species recovery programs. “They weigh just a few ounces and can fit in the palm of your hand.”

You got the world on a string, baby penguin, drinkin’ those gratis regurgitated fish smoothies, not even knowin’ if you’re a boy or a girl yet. You never be more free.

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