It’s not much of a surprise that Donald Trump Jr.’s Republican National Convention speech was one that was a bit, um, wired. Much like his girlfriend did earlier in the night, Trump Jr. came out with his foot planted firmly down on the gas pedal right from the start. But what caught the attention of many wasn’t his loud, frenzied speech but his red, glassy eyes. While Don Jr’s speech was something that resembled an SNL parody of a commencement address delivered by a speed freak, his eyes looked like the eyes of someone who just emerged from Willie Nelson’s tour bus. It was all very confusing!
In his speech, Trump Jr. called Joe Biden the “Loch Ness Monster of the swamp” and claimed that “Biden and the radical left are also now coming for our freedom of speech and want to bully us into submission.” He went on to note that “anarchists have been flooding our streets” and “small businesses across America — many of them minority owned — are being torched by mobs.” He promised that if his father is elected for four more years, Americans will have “the life you want to have – one with a great job, a beautiful home, and a perfect family. You can have it.”
But, again, people were much more captivated by his eyes than they were by the content of his speech.
JESUS CHRIST, WHAT'S WRONG WITH HIS EYES?
— Kevin M. Kruse (@KevinMKruse) August 25, 2020
I think my TV just got a cocaine nosebleed.
— Mark Harris (@MarkHarrisNYC) August 25, 2020
I think Jr has an allergy.
— Devin Nunes’ cow 🐮 (@DevinCow) August 25, 2020
Has donny jr been crying?
— Elizabeth Spiers (@espiers) August 25, 2020
Don Jr is completely baked
— Tom Nichols (@RadioFreeTom) August 25, 2020
Yeah, you got satin shoes
Yeah, you got plastic boots
Y'all got cocaine eyes
Yeah, you got speed-freak jive pic.twitter.com/nsKvJMU7lU
— Dan Lyons (@realdanlyons) August 25, 2020
Allergies or cocaine?
— Euan Rellie (@euanrellie) August 25, 2020
Holy shit, @DonaldJTrumpJr, did you do a fuckin' speedball before coming out? Do lines off Kimberly's tits?
— The Rude Pundit (@rudepundit) August 25, 2020
Tonight was only night one of the RNC. Can’t wait to see what the rest of the week will bring!