A man trying to dodge the fare at a London Tube station paid far, far more than a few quid for a ride when his inner thigh and penis somehow got snagged in the gate, which was caught in the above video posted to Facebook. Did I mention that there’s screaming? Oh, there’s screaming all right. The video, which has now been viewed nearly a quarter of a million times since Thursday, is two minutes and 11 seconds long, and trust me when I say you’ll feel every single one of those seconds.
For the most part, the bystanders that gathered around to view the ensuing spectacle mostly laughed and cracked jokes — because that’s how they roll in the United Kingdom — while London Underground workers and British Transit Police attempted to free the poor guy’s mangled penis from the hungry jaws of the gate. “Get some butter,” one passerby can be heard suggesting, “Butter ‘im up, butter ‘im up!”
Finally, the workers were able to free the man, to the applause of several witnesses. It doesn’t appear that he was arrested, as it seems more than safe to say he learned his lesson — and even hugged one of the officers after he was freed.
So there you have it. Just a few days before the end of the year, a solid entry for “worst things to happen to a penis in 2017,” rolling in hot.