Gwyneth Paltrow Would Like To Sell You A $950 Shot Glass & A $500 Jigger On Her Goop Website

When we last checked in on World’s Whitest Person Gwyneth Paltrow, she was dispensing her secrets for a successful relationship (more blowjobs, less arguing) in between getting a colonic and lecturing her gardener, Juan, on how juice cleanses and summers spent in chalets in the Swiss Alps are good for the complexion.

And as you may have heard, when she’s not making the world a better place with her farts, Gwyneth has a website called Goop, where she teaches people how to be better at being white, or something, and apparently sells exceedingly white people things. For instance, the woman married to the Coldplay guy is currently selling stuff for your home bar on her site, stuff described on Goop as “unique accessories for the well-stocked bar.” Let’s sample the goods, shall we?

I mean, the $950 shot thimble is a must-have, no? But wait! Don’t forget my personal fav, the $495 jigger.

I swear, I think Gwyneth is just f*cking with us some times.

(HT: Wayne Curtis)