When Twitter isn’t busy obsessing over Peloton Girl, twice, it’s spending an awful amount of time acting all weird and horny. Over the past couple of days, we’ve seen everyone from our closest followers to the Twitter accounts of multi-national corporations react to a dirty tweet on Netflix’s official Twitter account.
On December 5th, Netflix tweeted a simple question, “what’s something you can say during sex but also when you manage a brand twitter account?” and now every other corporate Twitter account can’t stop themselves.
what’s something you can say during sex but also when you manage a brand twitter account?
— Netflix US (@netflix) December 5, 2019
Anf just like that, the wholesome ways we view these brands has collapsed before our eyes. Like, did we need Mr. Peanut to answer with “I need a nut.”?! Did we?
How are we supposed to feel the next time we reach into a tin of mixed Planters nuts, and Mr. Peanut is staring back at us, winking about his most recent mixed-nut orgy through his pervert-y monocle? We all know Mr. Peanut f*cks now and there’s no way to undo that. If these aren’t signs of the end times, what are?
Some of the replies are seriously alarming, like we totally expect this kind of trash from Wendy’s, Arby’s, and Boston Market — they’re sickos. But et tu Grammarly? At the very least all of this is worth a laugh and finally gives us a break from all of those insufferable Spotify Wrapped posts.
Check out all the best/worst replies below.
I need a nut.
— Mr. Peanut (@MrPeanut) December 6, 2019
These are all Natural
— Natural Light (@naturallight) December 5, 2019
— Wingstop 🍗 (@wingstop) December 5, 2019
Sometimes it helps to blow on it first
— Tazo (@Tazo) December 5, 2019
Wow. 4 for 4.
— Wendy's (@Wendys) December 6, 2019
nice hot pocket
— Hot Pockets (@hotpockets) December 5, 2019
Can take anywhere between 7-10 minutes.
— Kraft Macaroni & Cheese (@kraftmacncheese) December 6, 2019
— Ubisoft (@Ubisoft) December 6, 2019
Use your fingers for best results 😉
— ColourPop Cosmetics (@ColourPopCo) December 6, 2019
Do you wanna take a lick?
— Ben & Jerry's (@benandjerrys) December 5, 2019
Do you want more meat?
— Arby's (@Arbys) December 5, 2019
Consider removing an article.
— Grammarly (@Grammarly) December 6, 2019
You can go elbow deep in me
— Kettle Brand Chips (@kettlebrand) December 6, 2019
I'm not sure we want to touch this.
— Paramount Network (@paramountnet) December 5, 2019
you’ve been waiting for this stuffing all year
— Boston Market (@bostonmarket) December 6, 2019
My hiney’s Charmin clean…👀
— Charmin (@Charmin) December 6, 2019