What Fall TV’s Spooky, Scariest Shows Would Look Like As ‘Goosebumps’ Books

I’m not gonna front (you can tell by my use of the word “front” that I wouldn’t lie to you): the cover of Night of the Living Dummy, the seventh book in R.L. Stine’s famed Goosebumps series, still scares the crap out of me. He’s like a young, wooden Josh Romney.

I bring this up not because I want to talk about the time I saw a kid in my school pee himself while reading The Haunted Mask (true story), but because our good buddy Jon Defreest recently cooked a batch of fake Goosebumps book jackets for Vulture, depicting American Horror Story, Dexter, and The Walking Dead as if they had been created by Stine, who, should he ever decide to do a choose-your-own-adventure story for AMC’s zombie series, must have every option ending with Lori Grimes being eaten. It’d sell a billion copies.