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8.12 The Cooler

The Young And The Restless

By 08.12.11
Ron Artest

Ron Artest, Dime #21


Rumors of Ron Artest playing in the UK were met with skepticism. The league he’s aiming for is probably the worst in all of Europe, and the team doesn’t even have the money to satisfy Artest. But now officials with the team he is signing with, the Cheshire Jets, are offering to help Artest with his career off the court. There is even talk of getting the Tru Warier onto a soap opera, where he could show how young and restless he really is. Can someone please make this happen? Artest could definitely play the overbearing boyfriend who butts heads with a rival over a lover and overdramatizes every scene … One of the biggest names going into the Hall of Fame this weekend is Arvydas Sabonis. We can’t count how many people have told us how he would’ve been unbelievable without the injuries, how he was robbed of his athleticism, and then robbed of a chance to play in the NBA by his government. But imagine if Sabonis had gotten to the NBA during his prime, with injuries or not. At the time, Portland was the most talented team in the West, and made the Finals twice despite lacking star power inside. With Sabonis there, things could’ve been VERY different, championship different. He was that good … What’s more annoying: Bruce Bowen? Or Bruce Bowen’s bow ties? We appreciate good taste, and we can feel you if you’re all about being different and separating yourself, but seriously bow ties? Every single day? They lose their luster if you go overboard with them. Bowen doesn’t seem to care, and he took a few people shopping with him to show how he gets down … We asked y’all yesterday if you thought Dwight Howard could really gain much from another summer session with Hakeem Olajuwon. After this long in the league, you are what you are at this point. He will probably never be Hakeem in the post just because that’s not his game, not his style. But Superman showed us recently: don’t underestimate him. You ever seen a big man move like that? … We dropped Brandon Jennings vs. Josh Selby, II yesterday and everyone we talked to was buzzing about how Selby gave the Bucks PG 40+ a second time. Looking deeper into the game, Jennings was putting in serious work before barely touching the ball in the second half. He actually scored 14 of his team’s first 16 points, banging threes like it was nothing … That back and forth was crazy, but check out the lobs Donte Greene and John Wall caught. More importantly, some dude behind the basket does his best Mark Madsen impersonation … Meanwhile, Wall had 36 points and was COMPLETELY into the game, jawing with everyone and playing like it was a playoff game in the NBA … 2K unveiled the soundtrack for NBA 2K12, and the lineup includes headlining artists like Royce & Em, Travis Barker, Kurtis Blow, Q-Tip and Pharoahe Monch & Smif N Wessun … Vanderbilt’s John Jenkins (24 points) canned eight threes in USA Men’s World University Games Team’s 88-61 exhibition win over the Chinese professional team New Century … Timofey Mozgov (18 points) apparently abused one poor defender with a monster facial in Russia’s 91-76 win over Lithuania in a tune-up for EuroBasket 2011 … The same team that was trying to sign Jordan Farmar, Maccabi Haifa, announced they have signed the talented Sean Williams to a two-year contract through the 2012-13 season … And Dennis Rodman plans to arrive at the Hall of Fame on a helicopter. How fitting. He also invited Howard Stern as his guest, and may even bring acrobats with him to perform … We’re out like Artest soap operas.

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TOPICS#DWIGHT HOWARD
TAGSArvydas SabonisBRANDON JENNINGSBRUCE BOWENDENNIS RODMANDonte GreeneJohn JenkinsJOHN WALLJosh SelbyNBA 2K12PORTLAND TRAIL BLAZERSRON ARTESTSean WilliamsSmackTIMOFEY MOZGOV

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