The website PVC Blue is dedicated to all things smurf, especially PVC smurfs, which apparently isn’t some esoteric smurf offshoot, but rather just what it sounds like: smurf dolls made out of PVC, like the pipes. Oh, internet, you teach me something useless every day. Anyway, the PVC Blue folks appear to have dug up the first image of a CGI smurf from the upcoming Smurfs 3D, which PVC Blue calls “Smurfy news!”
It’s good to see that the animation team didn’t work too hard on this, not that I blame them. Making a Smurfs movie is kinda like turning in a worksheet to a substitute teacher who you know isn’t going to grade it so you make every answer “Dildo, Newfoundland.” All that matters is it’s done. So what’s the deal, does he have on pants that are the exact same color as his shoes? Does he even have shoes? Is that some kind of white under-armour one piece specially designed for playful mischief? Or maybe they just painted his lower half white like a fruit tree, to keep out bugs? You can find answers to all this and more in my new book, Pointless Speculation about Pointless Things.
Tagline: “Say hello to our little friend.” “Our”, huh? That leads me to believe the target audience for this is EVERYONE BUT GARGAMEL.