Stephen Colbert Taste-Tested Starbucks’ ‘Sugary Affront To God,’ The Unicorn Frappuccino

News & Culture Writer
04.21.17

The new Unicorn Frappuccino at Starbucks might be the most divided people have been about a thing since the 2016 presidential election. Fans of the sugary drink like the fact that it looks really pretty on Instagram, and the sweet, sweet taste (we guess?); while everyone else thinks it looks like diabetes in a cup. The thing has been pretty much the bane of every Starbucks barista since it was introduced, but thankfully at least the limited edition drink is only around for a couple more days.

Not surprisingly, the sparkly pink frapp has been fodder for the late night shows this week, with Jimmy Kimmel coming up with his own take on the drink. Stephen Colbert took things a step further and actually gave the Unicorn Frappuccino a taste test Thursday night, or as he says, “Because the name ‘sugary affront to God’ was taken.” Better him than us, right?

Running through the components of the drink, Colbert explained that the Unicorn Frappuccino contains basically all of your food groups: “Mango, pink, blue, and obviously, ‘topping’ … The FDA recommends at least three servings of ‘topping’ a day.”

But how did it actually taste? After declaring that he “wished he was dead,” Colbert likened the experience to french kissing Tinkerbell, which he reminds us is not weird because “she’s an adult, she’s just very small.” So if that’s your thing, and I’m sure it’s somebody’s thing because there’s a fetish for everything, you have until April 23rd to try it for yourself.

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