Audrina Patridge is on the cover of the new issue of Maxim, and I owe her an apology. I’ve often complained about her face looking kinda weird, but as it turns out, if your body is super-hot it makes your face prettier. And these pictures, while annoyingly small, are evidence that I very much would like to remove her clothes and fail to please her sexually.
But I digress. This is a TV blog, and Audrina is on TV. Let’s see what fascinating news she has for us in that arena.
Is this really going to be your last season on The Hills? Why?
You know, it’s just something that I felt inside. I’m an adult now, and I don’t need all the petty drama and drinking and fighting. I’ve done that, and I’m ready to move on.
Can you spill anything about The Audrina Show?
The producer is Mark Burnett, who executive-produced Survivor. It’s a behind-the-scenes look at my life in L.A.—the movies and shoots and parties. It’s not as glamorous as it appears, plus it’ll actually feature people I know. It’s, like, real.
Will she be showering in this show? Showering’s pretty important, right? Like, she has to look good for the movies and shoots and parties, and I think showering is a pretty essential part of the behind-the-scenes action. I don’t want to tell Mark Burnett how to make his show, and I don’t want to come off as shallow here, but I don’t want any part of “The Audrina Show” unless she’s soaping up her breasts. I’m tough but fair.