If you missed the televised majesty of the first two hours of MTV’s “Jersey Shore,” then it’s possible you don’t know that this is Nicole, aka “Snooki.” She got really wasted her first night at the beach house and wanted to leave the show after two days because she wasn’t getting enough attention, which is odd considering that she got plenty of attention when she stripped down to her bra and thong underwear and got in the hot tub (even though a thong swimsuit would have been a little bit more classier if you’re gonna wear anything at all, you know what I mean?).
Anyway, the point is that if you watched “Jersey Shore,” you probably wished that someone would just punch this girl in the face. Consider this an early Christmas present from Zooped:
I have watched this approximately ten thousand times today, and I plan to watch it for most of the rest of the day. In fact, I never want to be not watching it.
(Editor’s note: violence against women is bad. Violence against people on “Jersey Shore” is encouraged, regardless of sex.)