Face Off (Syfy) – Season 3 premiere. You shouldn’t be allowed to just name some dumb reality show about “prosthetic makeup artists” after an extremely important action movie. Future generations would surely look back on this as a justifiable reason to revolt. You know, if we wanted to. Just saying.
White Collar/Covert Affairs (USA) – RANT ALERT: So Neal on White Collar is this big fancy art thief, right? And after he got caught, he was allowed to stay out of jail if he wore a tracking anklet and helped the FBI with future investigations. But he cuts the anklet and/or runs away every other episode, and like 80% of the time he tries to go undercover the criminals are like “Ahh, the famous thief Neal Caffrey” and it blows his cover. He’s a horrible asset and he should be back in jail. There, I said it.
Do Something Awards 2012 (VH1) – Jake Johnson, Max Greenfield and Lamorne Morris from New Girl host an award show honoring young people’s philanthropic efforts. Because if there’s one reason to get into philanthropy, it’s the sweet, sweet accolades.
The L.A. Complex (The CW) – I’m grumpy today.
Pretty Little Liars (ABC Family) – I’m sorry.
Storage Wars (A&E) – It’s just that I’ve had a rough day and Tuesday TV is TERRIBLE now that all our regular shows (Workaholics, Justified, etc.) are over for the year, and really miss them.
Hard Knocks (HBO) – So, yeah. I’m just going to watch a bunch of ’90s R&B videos until this comes on.
LATE NIGHT GUESTS: Gordon Ramsay and Jordin Sparks on Kimmel; Bill Hader and Mary-Louise Parker on Letterman; Rashida Jones on a repeat of Ferguson; Shia LeBoeuf and Jean-Claude Van Damme on Leno; Tyra Banks, Jim Norton, and Rob Burnett on Fallon; and Larry David and Lena Dunham on Conan.