When we last checked in with Magic City, the Starz organized crime drama was having trouble finding actresses with real boobs. You see, the show is set in 1950s Miami, before the age of artificially-enhanced breasts, so when producers were running around present-day Miami looking for period appropriate women they could feature on the show, they had just a heckuva time. “Where have all the real boobs gone?” I imagine they sung to the tune of Paula Cole’s 1997 single “Where Have All the Cowboys Gone?,” while strumming an out of tune acoustic guitar and emptying out the minibar in their beachfront hotel after another fruitless day of staring at huge fake breasts like a martyr or something.
Well apparently all that hard work paid off, because noted corny schtick enthusiast Mr. Skin announced the winners of the 14th Annual Anatomy Awards this week, and Magic City beat out stiff competition like Game of Thrones and Shameless to take home the coveted prize. “Emmy Schmemmy,” producers probably said as they continued flipping through a six-inch thick binder full of pictures of attractive people in their underwear. “This is what matters.”
And so we congratulate you, Magic City. Your unwavering diligence and commitment to your craft is truly something from which we can all learn.