“Hellcats” is the CW’s new show about college cheerleading debuting September 8th. Aly Michalka plays the sarcastic blonde who has to join the cheerleading squad to pay for law school, while Ashley Tisdale (High School Musical) is the perky brunette cheerleading captain. WHAAAA? That’s totally backwards! If Hollywood has taught me anything about cheerleaders, it’s that blondes are perky and brunettes are sarcastic. And also that the whip-cream bikini is a viable seduction method.
In one of the videos below, Tisdale spouts off the typical “cheerleaders work really hard” expository dialog:
“We spend twenty hours a week practicing. We bench press twice our body weight and run a seven-minute mile. We are ATHLETES.”
Um, no. No, they can’t bench press twice their body weight. A 95-pound cheerleader can’t bench 190 pounds. Not unless she has ant DNA.
Anyway, there’s a teaser trailer and a six-minute sneak preview for “Hellcats” below. The downside is that it looks exactly like every single cheerleading story ever. The upside is that it looks exactly like every single cheerleading story ever. Which is to say: lots of flexible women with fantastic bodies. There are worse things to watch.