Gender equality, it’s like…wow. First, everyone could do it, then no one could. Now, equal means different, black means yellow, white means black, and nothing is as it seems. You tell me that men still earn more than women, even though Roe Wade fixed everything. To which I respond, no, more like girl power. Oh yeah, that reminds me: the next time a guy tries to tell me he’s worth more than me, I’ll say, yes, that’s, like, true, but better education.
Think about it, guys. (Miss Utah is the real-life Girl You Wish You Hadn’t Started a Conversation With at a Party.)