As we learned in the Bible, Jesus rose from the dead on Easter Sunday because he didn’t want to miss all the awesome TV on that night. Check it out:

Breaking Bad (AMC) — This season has started a little slow, but there are clouds gathering. Mexican clouds. Clouds with axes.

The Pacific (HBO) — After a peaceful third episode of getting drunk and slaying Aussie tail, the Marines get back to the other thing they do well: wholesale slaughter of America’s enemies. Watch a preview here.

Life (Discovery) — Tonight’s episodes are “Birds” and “Creatures of the Deep,” the latter of which will feature the first-ever video from the depths of your mom’s vagina.

Next week: All of the above, plus the premiere of “Treme.” HOLY CRAP I CAN’T WAIT.

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