A Man In Zimbabwe Woke Up To Find An Eight-Foot Crocodile Hiding Under His Bed

Nope.

It sounds like the stuff of nightmares – but Guy Whittall will certainly be checking for ‘monsters’ underneath his bed, after waking up to find an eight foot crocodile hiding just inches from where he slept. [Daily Mail]

Absolutely not.

The following morning Mr Whittall – a former Zimbabwean cricketer – had even perched on the edge of his bed, with his feet dangling over the edge, just inches from the crocodile’s face, as he organised his day.

But the 40-year-old remained oblivious to his uninvited guest and was only alerted when he was enjoying some breakfast in the kitchen and heard the petrified screams of a housemaid.

Not even a little bit.

“The really disconcerting thing about the whole episode is the fact that I was sitting on the edge of the bed that morning, bare foot and just centimetres away from the croc.

“Crocodiles are experts at hiding, that’s why they have survived on Earth for so long and why they are the ultimate killers in water.”

If anyone needs me, I’ll be spending the rest of my life inside my apartment with all the doors and windows locked, wide as hell awake, hiding under the covers in a bed surrounded by bear traps.

(Via Gawker)