The fickle Gods of WordPress have decided that we’ll be going in reverse alphabetical order this week, so we begin with The Witch, which probably had the coolest set of posters of 2015. This one isn’t nearly as cool as the goat one, but few things are. It also looks pretty sexy for a movie that’s mostly about English colonists digging in the dirt in a malarial wilderness wearing 10 pounds of wool with buckles on it because God said so. Man, those people sucked. I assume “a witch” was anyone having fun.
It’s nice when an actress is unrecognizable on a poster because the movie seems like a departure rather than because they’ve photoshopped her to death. Anyway, the explosion says “war movie” but the yellow text says “cheeky war movie.”
These cartoons seem somewhat easy to write, so… why not go with a story where the kids might accidentally learn something? Nah, let’s go with Victorian-era birthing myths. “Storks! From the studio that brought you Mulattoes and The Vapors. ”