Bunk Beds In San Francisco Are Going For $1,800; Seven Awesome Places You Can Rent For Way Less

09.11.15 3 years ago
"Sure, it's a tropical paradise. But do they have clam chowder in hollowed out sourdough loaves?"

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"Sure, it's a tropical paradise, but what's the clam chowder in a bread bowl situation?"

There is a time for sleeping in bunk beds. The time is childhood and then again at age 22 in a hostel that smells like tortilla soup in a country that has no tortilla soup. But for 30 desperate souls in San Francisco, bunk beds have become a necessity.

As reported by CBS yesterday, bunk-bed mattress space in the city is being rented for $1,800 a month. Tenants are crowded in two- or four-person rooms, and, to further the humiliation, must also use shared bathrooms, a communal kitchen, and must stay more than 30 days to skirt San Francisco’s new short-term rental ordinance. Potential renters must also submit to a questionnaire and a Skype interview before they’re even allowed the pleasure of recreating this scene with complete strangers.

And as neat as San Francisco is (and it is), it doesn’t have to be so crowded. San Francisco is a beautiful city, and there are lots of exciting jobs and restaurants and bars, but there are other places in the world that are just as beautiful, just as exciting, and just as filled with interesting things to do. Most importantly, you can actually afford to live in them. In fact, you can live in countless amazing spots while paying less (and sometimes a lot less) than the rent on a mattress in a glorified flophouse in San Francisco.

So why sleep on that bunk bed, haunted by the snores and sleep farts of strangers, when you can live…

 

At an ocean front resort in Ambatovaky, Madagascar

Forest Deco Hotel

airbnb.com

"Do you miss the fog? Because I don't miss the fog."

Spend a month lounging on the white sand beaches at the Forest Deco Hotel in Ambatovaky, Madagascar for only $982. Book on airbnb.com here.

The Forest Deco’s already amazing price includes a complimentary breakfast! You could easily spend $982 just on a month’s worth of breakfast-related expenses in San Francisco (you’d be eating a lot of scones, but you could do it). Seriously, the place looks glorious. That driftwood chair up there has to be at least as comfortable as a bunk-bed mattress, right?

In your own private house in Mexico

bucerias air bnb

airbnb.com

"How do I relax without a thousand sea lions screaming at me?"

This beautiful two-bedroom home in Bucerias, Mexico, with a private pool can be rented for only $1,568 a month. And when you’re ready to swap the chlorinated water for the salty, the ocean is just a short walk away. Book on airbnb.com here.

And as long as you’re in Bucerias, definitely go to the nearby Luna Luna restaurant for the best enchiladas suizas on Earth. When was the last time San Francisco gave you memorable enchiladas suizas?

Inside the walls of an ancient city in Italy

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