In Which We Explore ‘The Wizarding World Of Harry Potter’ With Someone Who Knows Nothing About Harry Potter

When I asked to attend the opening of the Wizarding World of Harry Potter, I thought I’d spend my day blissfully roaming around the charmingly rundown Hogsmeade Village, butter beer in hand, basking in all the obscure details the Universal Studios people packed into their park. Instead, I had to hang out with some guy who knows nothing about Harry Potter, who only wanted to make wand jokes.

But the day wasn’t a total bust. Brandon learned about magic pictures where the subjects move and talk like their real human selves, what picking out a wand is like (and got a “one-size fits-all” joke out of his system), and how not to cast a revealing spell. Plus he clearly enjoyed having a Go-Pro trained on his face while on the Flight of the Hippogriff ride, and he couldn’t help making a song request to the kitschy Harry Potter chorus.

Don’t just read about how our day went, though, check out the not-at-all embarrassing video above. Despite his serious face, and likening the name “Hogwarts” to an HPV outbreak, I think Brandon had a good time. Even if he didn’t, I managed to enjoy myself, and that’s the important part here.