Scottie Pippen Commits Sacrilege, is Turncoat S.O.B.

In a story that threatens to destroy Twitter, former Chicago Bulls second banana legend Scottie Pippen went on ESPN’s Mike and Mike (and mike) in the Morning this morning and said, and I quote (because I don’t want to type it myself):

“Michael Jordan is probably the greatest scorer to ever play in the game. But I may go as far to say Lebron James may be the the greatest player to ever play the game.”

To put this into perspective, imagine if John Stockton went on The Today Show and said Karl Malone was okay, he guesses, but he wishes he could’ve passed the ball to Tom Chambers more often. Imagine if Chico Marx could somehow communicate from the grave about how much funnier Jeff Foxworthy is than Groucho. Imagine if Laurel said f**k Hardy and teamed up with Costello. This is the situation Scottie Pippen has put us in. And that doesn’t even begin to scratch the surface of how full of a horse’s sh:t he is, or how angry Kobe Bryant should be about being the B.J. Armstrong in Pippen’s comparison.

I’m no basketball analyst, and living in Cleveland for four years turned me into exactly the kind of LeBron James fan you’d expect, so I’m not going to pretend to invalidate Pippen’s opinion. If he thinks Zydrunas Ilgauskas could lay up a mudhole in Kareen Abdul-Jabbar, so be it. But come on, man, saying LeBron is better than Jordan? LeBron isn’t even the best player on his team. What’s next, Benedict Arnold looks like he could end up being a pretty great leader?