UFC 172 Results And Live Discussion: Smell The Glove(r)

The UFC returns to pay-per-view (Don’t steal this thing, you donks!) as UFC 172 comes straight outta Baltimore. You can check out the supremely fantastic, accurate, and hilarious With Leather Staff Predictions and even throw out your own prognostications before coming back here to talk about this, THE MOST STACKED CARD IN THE HISTORY OF THE ULTIMATE FIGHTING CHAMPIONSHIPS!*

* – Stackedness of card subject to change and gross hyperbole by Dana White

The punch-stivities kick off on UFC Fight Pass at 7:30 PM ET with Chris Beal taking on Patrick Williams. Beal was on TUF, so he’s got that going for him. Whatever!

The bulk of the prelims are going to be on Fox Sports 1 at 8:00 PM ET. Lots of fun stuff here, as Charlie Brenneman is facing a guy who punches hard, which is terrible news for “The Spaniard”. We’ve also got a rad women’s bantamweight fight between Bethe “Pitbull” Correia and the ultra-lanky, ultra-Kentucky Jessamyn “The Gun” Duke. That should be several kinds of awesome. Square-headed Takanori Gomi is going to be in action against Isaac Vallie-Flagg in what is hopefully not the former PRIDE champ’s last hurrah. The prelims end with a flyweight fight between Joseph Benavidez and tiny Daniel Bryan look-alike, Tim Elliott. Benavidez is from Team Alpha Male, and that means I have to link this video.

The pay-per-view main card goes live at 10:00 PM ET, and dang it, y’all, don’t link or ask for links to streams on the comments, that’s super not cool. Anyway, the main card starts off with two lanky as heck featherweights, Max “Blessed” Holloway versus Andre “Touchy” Fili. Then there’s a lightweight fight between Jim “The Good Brother of the Good Miller Brothers” Miller (Suck it, Micah, Cole, and Dan!) and Yancy Medeiros. The card continues up in weight as 185 pounders “Handsome” Luke Rockhold and Tim “Tiny Rothwell” Boetsch square off. The co-main event is a light heavyweight affair betwixt the returning Anthony “Rumble” Johnson and Phil “Mr. Wonderful” Davis (Hey, wrestling nerds, that was his cat’s name, so calm down).

Finally, we come to the MAIN EVENT OF THE EVENING. A light heavyweight title fight between Glover Teixeira and the current, reigning, defending champion, Jon “Bones” Jones. I’ll be honest, I’m not expecting a particularly long fight, nor am I anticipating much offense out of Glover. I’m generally wrong about stuff like this, though.

Anyway, let’s have some fun in the comments as we discuss UFC 172, live from Baltimore, Maryland. On that note, please keep The Wire references to a minimum since I’ve never seen the series.