Every Friday, we pick the winners of the most tantalizing matchups from around the world. And sometimes baseball. Home teams in ALL CAPS.
Tonight: Colorado -4 over TOLEDO. So was Jamie Farr really gay? Or were the producers of M*A*S*H just like, “Well, let’s come up with one way to get this guy out of fatigues? Wow, that sounded a little gay right there.
Tiger-Cats -1 over ARGONAUTS. Toronto is 2-7 on the year. I have to assume that, even in Canada, that sucks.
Stampeders +1 over ESKIMOS. Both teams are 5-4, yet Edmonton is 1-3 at home and allowed almost 60 more points on the year than they’ve scored. Though I’m a bit squeamish about only getting one point against Ricky Ray.
Saturday… IOWA STATE +6 over Iowa. Wait a second…the Hawkeyes nearly lose to Northern Iowa…and you’re giving me six points? Yes, please.
UNC at UCONN, over 45. UConn gave up 16 points last week to Ohio, a team that’s pretty good at not being very good. If they can run it against UNC, this will get out of hand in a hurry.
Syracuse +28.5 over PENN STATE. The Lions might be the only team in the Big Ten that does anything on the national scene this year, but they’re still in the Big Ten. Which brings me to…
Southern Cal -7.5 over OHIO STATE. Jim Tressel is going to punch Matt Barkley in the face and he’ll be immediately terminated the next day. Maybe.
MICHIGAN +3 over Notre Dame. Only because I couldn’t place a bet for “Meteor.”
Sunday: Vikings -4.5 over BROWNS. Brett Favre and Brady Quinn in the same game. Ugh, I’ll just wait for the box score.
Broncos +4.5 over BENGALS. You might think Josh McDaniels’ team is in disarray. They don’t know disarray. Cincinnati are the gaddamn KINGS of disarray.
Redskins +6.5 over GIANTS. Maybe I’ve been hanging out with Unsilent Majority too long, but I’m not convinced that the Redskins are that bad.
Bills at PATRIOTS, under 47.5. Buffalo’s getting 11 points in this game. Still not enough for a team that just fired its offensive coordinator a week ago.