Arnold Schwarzenegger is getting ready to take over as host of The Apprentice, replacing some guy I don’t remember whatever he probably isn’t up to anything anyway, and if you’re wondering if NBC is taking this all very, very seriously, the answer is “Yes.” A resounding yes. A resounding, borderline hilarious yes, with elements of secrecy usually reserved for high-level government intelligence reports, like the ones our next president has started receiving, whoever our next president is I should look that up it’s probably fine.
Case in point, the catchphrase. There will be a new catchphrase. There must be a new catchphrase. And not even Arnold himself knows what it is yet. From The Hollywood Reporter:
NBC hopes to further build buzz by playing one hand close to the vest: Schwarzenegger’s version of “You’re fired,” Trump’s indelible diss for 14 seasons, has yet to be revealed. “We narrowed it down to like eight of my sayings from the movies and one other option, but even I don’t know yet,” says Schwarzenegger. Multiple endings were shot for every episode (filming on the Marina del Rey set wrapped in March for all but the live finale), and NBC reality chief Paul Telegdy has gone on record saying heads will roll if the selection leaks before its television debut.
Nine options! Nine! You know you’re a legit action star when you have nine catchphrases. And I love that there are eight from his movies and “one other option.” What do you think that other one is? I hope it’s something awful like “Make like a banana and split.” I would pay good money to hear Arnold say that.
But anyway, yes. The movie lines. That’s what is interesting here. Let’s run down some contenders, shall we?
9. “It’s not a tumor!” — Kindergarten Cop
This will not be the catchphrase. It doesn’t even make sense. I’m only including it because a) obligatory, and b) I just pictured him shouting this at some confused D-list celebrity in the first episode and it made me laugh.
ARNOLD: “It’s not a tumor!”
SANJAYA OR WHOEVER: “So… am I still on the show or…?”
ARNOLD: “I said it’s not a tumor!”
SANJAYA OR WHOEVER OR MAYBE DOG THE BOUNTY HUNTER I DON’T KNOW I’M NOT LOOKING THE CONTESTANTS UP: “So… I should go? I’ll just go.”